Category Archives: General Football
I don’t even know what to do with this. Regular readers will remember that I came to like Tim Tebow late last season, but mostly because I’m a massive troll and everyone else hated him. Now that he’s a Jet… man. Man.
Presumably he’s there to run the Wildcat (or whatever the Jets call their version of it). This will only get awful when Mark Sanchez has his first bad game and everyone goes something something. At least it’s not Brett Favre.
I think I need a little more time on this one. Luckily we have until September. For now, point:
Counterpoint:
But then that’s not exactly breaking news, is it?
- Andres Torres left last night’s Spring Training game with a strained calf. He said he thinks he’ll only be out a couple of days, but a) that’s what they all say and b) it has been like two or three days since a full-fledged Mets-fan freakout so people were getting antsy.
In Torres’ absence, Terry Collins will try Jason Bay and Jordany Valdespin in center along with Adam Loewen and Mike Baxter, who have already been working there. Bay apparently volunteered for the tryout, which is great and all, but actually using him in center field in meaningful games is a terrible idea. Also, if you’re using Bay in center, who is it that’s playing left field and isn’t better at center than Jason Bay?
As for Valdespin, I was ready to pooh-pooh the idea based on the 32 errors he made in 98 games at shortstop last year, which I mentioned yesterday. But then I remembered that BJ Upton was once an error-prone Minor League shortstop too and is now a pretty good Major League center fielder. Obviously the two cases are very different for a variety of reasons, but if the Mets want to move Valdespin off shortstop and feel he has the athleticism for center, it doesn’t seem like it can hurt to try. It’s pretty late in the game to expect him to play there in the Majors by Opening Day, though, especially since he hasn’t yet done anything to suggest he’s a Major League hitter.
- The Jets told the Daily News that they’re “players in the Tebow race.” But really aren’t we all in some way players in the Tebow race?
I don’t even know that it’s a bad idea from a football standpoint. Tebow can’t really throw, but obviously he’s got some value running the option as a change of pace. Hard to say if it’ll be worth whatever he gets paid, since — as voice of reason Antonio Cromartie pointed out — Jeremy Kerley and Joe McKnight can run the team’s Wildcat offense, too.
But Tebow’s fantastic for web traffic, so there is that to consider.
- The Post reports that Tim Tebow likes some beautiful woman I had never heard of before who is reportedly involved in an on-and-off relationship with some presumably beautiful dude I had never heard of before. The Post reports on this like it’s sports, which is hilarious: “The split leaves the door open for Tebow to nab Agron.”
Nab!
Also, if this woman has really ditched her man and is now open for Tebow, look for him to make a wobbly pass that falls seven yards short of her or just pump fake in her general direction and take off running.
Moreno, 24, was pulled over Feb. 1 while driving a Bentley at about 70 mph on Interstate 25 near Quincy Avenue and Union Avenue, according to a report by Denver television station KDVR-31. The posted speed limit in the area usually is 65 mph but is currently posted at 45 mph because it’s a construction zone.
Police gave Moreno a breath test and a field sobriety test and took the former Georgia star to a detox facility. He was charged with DUI, failing to have insurance and careless driving. He is scheduled to be arraigned March 2, court records state.
The personalized license plate on the car Moreno was driving read “SAUCED,” according to KDVR-31.
Yikes. If you’re playing at home: Knowshon Moreno was speeding through a construction zone while driving drunk in an uninsured Bentley convertible with a license plate that says “SAUCED.”
No joke I can make here is going to top the actual news there. Derek Jeter gives out post-coital giftbaskets to women he sleeps with. Dick Cheney shot a guy in the face. The man’s name is Weiner and he tweeted his penis.
Via Shutdown Corner, via Ted Burke.
The Sports Pickle does some good work putting together a gallery of embarrassing photos of Tom Brady. But I think most would probably argue that getting fed poolside by a bikini-clad supermodel is not technically embarrassing. And this one’s just weird. Tom Brady’s got your goat:
Via @Section518.
They should sign Prince to a lifetime contract to play every halftime show forever. You said the past, so I’d say James Brown or the Beatles, but truth is the Super Bowl halftime show calls for a more arena-friendly aesthetic that Prince is perfect for. That’s not to say James Brown and the Beatles never could have or did play stadiums, only that Prince’s music has a certain towering awesomeness that lends itself to fireworks accompaniment.
The best I can come up with is an attempted sac bunt that’s accidentally popped into no-man’s land over the head of a charging infielder and goes for a base hit. Not exactly the same thing, but closest I can come up with.
Not even close for me. I don’t hate the Yankees as much as most Mets fans, but I also don’t really hate the Giants even a little. I’m ambivalent toward the Giants and I hate the Patriots, so the choice was easy.
Catsmeat is referring to this series of photos that Tom Brady for some reason posed for. And, of course, this classic. Plus maybe some of his UGG ads and a screengrab from that time he cried when considering how without football he might have been an insurance salesman.
But the answer is no. Hamels is the Internet’s clear leader* in embarrassing photos.
*- non-porn division.
This is a great day for Giants fans. And there’s a real obvious and important lesson about counting teams out when they’re losing a bunch of games in a row or getting trounced by the Redskins or just sort of floundering for long stretches of the regular season. But presumably you slept last night and are more fit than I am to draw those connections.
The important thing to all us long-suffering Jets and Mets fans too bleary-eyed to yet see this as evidence for patience and hope is that the Patriots lost. So hooray for that.
